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You Just Can’t Win!

December 17, 2018 by Comments

 

CHARACTERS: Mother, Teenage Daughter

SETTING:  At a department store

 

Mother:  How about this one hon?

 

Teenager:  Mom, you gotta lower your voice

 

Mother: What?


Teenager:  Mom, you’re speaking way too loud.  Everyone around us can hear you.

 

Mother:  What are you talking about?

 

Teenager: You just speak too friggin loud.

 

Mother:  You’re just being a teenager and just the sound of my voice annoys you – no matter what the volume.

 

Teenager:  No mom, I mean it.  You are speaking way too loud and you’re embarrassing me!

 

Mother:  All I said was “how about this one hon?”  How is that embarrassing?


Teenager:  Mom, do you see those two ladies looking at us?  They just heard what you said and started staring.

 

Mother:  Maybe they’re staring because you’re so beautiful.  Did you ever think of that?


Teenager:  Ha, ha, real funny.  But seriously, even in the car when you speak on the bluetooth, or when you talk on the phone to me, you’re really loud.

 

Mother:  Are you sure you just don’t have extra special, super de-duper hearing?

 

Teenager:  Yeah right!  Ask dad if you don’t believe me. Or better yet, notice how the dog’s ears perk up when you speak around him to other people.

 

Mother: That’s not fair using my sweet pup against me.  But okay, I will try to speak softer. The only reason I may speak louder is because I never know if you hear me or not.  Sometimes it takes two or three times of me asking the same thing to even get a response out of you. And, besides, I’ve got tinnitus in my left ear so I don’t hear that well when there’s outside noises around – so I must speak louder because I assume if I can’t hear you, then you can’t hear me.

 

Teenager:  Look, I’m not trying to criticize you, I just want you to think about speaking lower when you’re with me – whatever the reason is, okay????

 

Mother: You got it.


Teenager: Thanks.

 

Mother (whispering):  So hon, what do you think of this one?

 

Teenager: What?  Mom, speak up will ya????

 

THE END


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Ali Skylar (153 Posts)

Ali Skylar’s mission is to use inspirational words, positive affirmations, mindfulness exercises and positive songs to help you learn how to change your life and have a true spiritual awakening! Ali uses her Shiftitudes -uniquely crafted self-affirmation acronyms - blog, books and courses to help keep you committed to your spiritual journey! Also, her Quotitudes – inspirational sayings, encouraging words and inspirational quotes about life - gently aid in helping you to achieve a positive mental attitude essential for personal growth and presence of mind. Chat with Ali on Google+ | Facebook | Twitter | Pinterest | YouTube


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