Acts Of Kindness | Serving Others To Soothe Savage Ego Beast
December 13, 2012 by Ali Skylar Comments
During this holiday season instead of seeing, condemning and judging all the “consumerism” of the holidays, I’ve been opening my eyes to a more loving aspect of the holidays that for some reason has until this year passed me by. I’ve noticed A LOT of people serving other people in myriads of ways.
I observe these acts of kindness and think to myself:
“How the hell does my friend Judy, working mom of two have the time to go out and shop for all those toys for tots and deliver them all over the state?”
“How does hard working entrepreneur Theo find the time to continue to go down to the shore to help those affected by Sandy?”
“How does my dear friend JM spend all her days (and many nights) helping cancer patients find peace, wake up with her sick cats and always have time to give more to whomever reaches out for help?
Who would I be today if I had spent more time thinking about “how can I serve others” rather than “how can I serve my own drive for purpose and meaning?” Come to think about it, perhaps this whole spiritual movement to discover and fulfill our “purpose and meaning” is nothing more than the ego getting a slick hold in the spiritual realm to kid us into thinking that we’re evolving when all we’re doing is revolving around the same theme of “me” but in a “higher realm.”
I see myself as a kind and compassionate person but am I truly a “service” oriented person who is driven to make this world a better place by doing more than just what my immediate family’s needs are?
I look at today’s kid generation, most of whom have grown up with so many more advantages and “things” than any generation before and so many of these kids just seem either so bored, anxious, self-destructive, angry and definitely very self-involved. They don’t know what to do with themselves unless they’re in front of the tv, at a child based activity, connecting on their cell phone or posting on facebook. Talk to parents and many of them will tell you how “ungrateful” their kids are and how hard it is to get their kids to help out and gracefully contribute to the family unit.
Maybe that’s where our generation of parents missed the boat. Many of us have made it about “getting” as opposed to “giving.” We wanted to do so much better than our “survival-oriented” parents that as adults we unconsciously role model getting all the time – working towards that promotion at work, trying to find more time for ourselves to “relax” so that we can feel better, and all the many other ways that we work to make our lives and our kids’ lives more comfortable and “secure.”
Are we happier as a result of our “get-up, get-it and go” mentality? Just seems like a lot more anxiety, unhappiness, unfulfillment, fear, doubt and confusion have arisen alongside gaining the objects of our desire to “feel good” and “fulfill our purpose and meaning” in life.
What if the devotion to service is, and always has been, the key antidote to thwarting the uncontrollable growth and tumorous nature of the ego, the false self that keeps us locked in fear, doubt and confusion, and a toxic “ME” energy that doesn’t truly serve ourselves or the planet?
What if by making our main goal UNCONDITIONALLY serving others we ultimately serve ourselves and fulfill our purpose and our meaning?
A whole new way for me to look at “getting” what I want – especially in these ever changing energetic times where US and ONE are becoming the new ME.
How do you serve and how has it served you?
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3 responses to “Acts Of Kindness | Serving Others To Soothe Savage Ego Beast”
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Thanks Ali! Love this post and it is what we try to model to our children…service to others is often more important than service to self. It has taken some years to see this take root but I think both our kids have experienced the "good" feeling of helping others and hopefully that feeling will serve as a reinforcement for decades of serving others. Fortunately for us there is so much need in our own backyard it was easy to find meaningul ways to help serive the local community.
K, you are also one of those parents who have done a marvelous job role modeling service and serving others. I see you too as one of those noble beings who got it right this time around!!
Interesting Ali, I have also been thinking about that self-centeredness and how that theme has evolved in my own life. Coming from a give-all perspective to the other side of the spectrum. Somewhere there is the balance.